What Do You Think About….Life After Love

There are some of us who get into a marriage at a young age.  Stay with that one person for the entirety of our lives and live happily ever after.

Then there are those of us that get burned by love some time.  We either fall in love with someone who doesn’t fall back for us, get hurt by our spouse or fall out out of love mutually and find ourselves alone.

What do you do if you find yourself alone?  Sit and feel bad for yourself for days, weeks, months, years?  Go out and find someone new right away, even if it is just for a night and not for the rest of your life?

When a long term relationship ends, what is your grieving process?  Are they still in your life and if so, does that make it even more difficult to get over it and move on?

5 1/2 years ago my ex and I broke up.  I mourned it for a really long time, in fact there is still a part of me that is.  Not at all because I miss him, our marriage or our relationship, but because I feel like I failed something.  I see him once every week or two and can’t even remember what drew me to him to begin with anymore.

I started “dating” online just a few months after we broke up.  I talked to a few different men and even met up with a few.  Then after about six months, I had someone that I called my boyfriend for 3 months.  At the time, I dove completely head first.  I kept my eyes closed to all the real life things and just wanted to walk through this fantasy relationship.

Now looking back at it, I know that I needed that relationship bridge.   I needed to find someone who could make me feel loved, but who wasn’t necessarily the right person for me.  Who could help me learn a little bit more about myself and show me that I could in fact find a man who would treat me right and love me for me.

Nearly one year later, I found Paul.  It was a whirlwind romance.  We knew each other for 8 weeks and got engaged.  Our eyes were wide open, as were our hearts and we were just going where this relationship could take us.

How easy is that for people to do?  Can you let go of the hurt enough to give someone else a chance?

After a hard break up, how did you move on?

 

 

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5 thoughts on “What Do You Think About….Life After Love

  1. I think it’s great that you moved on and found your partner. Takes alot of guts in my opinion
    For me, it’s more like I’ve lost faith in men. I can’t really trust them. I’m sure there are good ones out there, but at this moment in time I have other priorities, my boys. It would be great if some kind of angel would appear out of nowhere but I don’t see that happening lol

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Yes, I was able to move on. It was hard, but it took me time. My ex and I were separated for almost 3 years before the divorce was final. It wasn’t all my ex’s fault. I wasn’t a model wife, but I didn’t deserve some of the BS. When I started owning my own issues and realizing what I was doing then I learned to forgive myself and move on. I had a bridge relationship and now I’m ready for a full fledged relationship.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I enrolled in yoga classes. I did belly dancing. I wrote a lot of “heartachy” blogs 🙂 Letting go is hard but that’s the only way. And yeah forgiveness too.. you need to forgive yourself in order to move on 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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